Each week we take a question from a softball player, parent or coach and pass on to our long-time contributor, Cathi Aradi, one of the most knowledgeable people in softball when it comes to the recruiting process.

If you’d like to ask Cathi a question, e-mail us at brentt.eads@flosports.tv and we’ll pass it along.

Today, Cathi covers how a player should act when at an event but not yet between the lines…

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Recruiting Question: I hear a lot of talk about how coaches look at you at a game or tournament and how you act with your parents and coaches.  Like I heard it’s a bad thing for your dad or mom to carry your bag.  What do you think are some of the top do’s and don’t's when it comes to impressing or turning off college coaches in stuff not just on the field? --- Kaitlyn, Kansas City, Mo.

Cathi’s Answer: This is an excellent question, Kaitlyn!  Coaches do pay attention to how families act, both when the player is successful and when she (or the team) appears to be struggling. 

While everyone has bad moments, days when they're not at their best, and so on, it's important to keep the game in perspective.  If you miss a ball or strike out, coaches want to know that you can step back, see why it happened, and work to improve your performance the next time. The worst thing you can do is hang your head, feel sorry for yourself, and lose sight of the fact that this is a team game.

The same applies to your parents. They need to maintain both their distance and their perspective. They should be your cheerleaders and your support system, but they shouldn't be coaching you from the stands or letting everyone else know they don't approve of how your coach is doing things.

As for carrying your bag, I guess that depends upon why you're not carrying it.  If you're icing your shoulder or if your coach has called a meeting, there's probably no harm in mom or dad grabbing your gear and heading for the car. But if you're letting them carry it because you don't want to, that might make a coach wonder about your maturity level.

Remember, when you go off to college, mom and dad won't be there to do your laundry, help you get your homework done, make sure you eat properly, OR be responsible for your softball activities. That's going to be on your head--as it should be! 

So it's not a bad idea to start taking responsibility for these things while you're still in high school.  It will be great practice for being on your own in a year or two!

— Cathi Aradi
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Catharine Aradi is the author of Preparing to Play Softball at the Collegiate Level, published by the National Fastpitch Coaches Assoc. (www.nfca.org). She has over 20 years of experience working as a recruiting consultant with athletes and colleges around the U.S and Canada.

If you would like knowledgeable, one-on-one guidance through the often bewildering labyrinth of recruiting, Ms. Aradi’s company, Collegiate Softball Connection, offers “concierge” recruiting services. Unlike corporate websites that rely upon mass marketing of hundreds and hundreds of athletes, Ms. Aradi works with the individual player and her family to ensure a successful college search.

She works individually with athletes to guide them through the recruiting journey and also offers Skype workshops on the college search process for groups of all sizes.

Detailed information is available on her website www.fastpitchrecruiting.com. Cathi can be reached by e-mail at info@fastpitchrecruiting.com or by calling 415-456-6449. Remember: if you use the code “fullcountsoftball” when signing up with CSC, you will be entitled to a $100 discount off her Fast Track or Elite options!

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